ChapterFive
The Lovingale
I was actually the last one out. Felix said I was being dramatic, and maybe I was, but for a moment I stayed in the wagon and stared at the quaint yellow house seated in a row of other cottages. We had to go through town, up a lane that went partly through the woods, and pull into a road to get here. Our own road.
It was nicer than the other houses, something I was thankful for. I could see Father had chosen this one with thought.
Lilacs bloomed along a little white path that led to the door. And there was a gate, a white gate that you had to unlatch to get inside a miniature garden of our own.
I was met by the sweet fragrances of pink roses, bluestars, and scarlet yarrows bending their heads to me. I recognized most of these plants because back home, Aunt Vicky had lent me a book about the nature around here, and I remembered from the pictures.
I left the wagon and even forgot my suitcase. I bumped into Henry on the way, and he muttered angry things under his breath.
There were cream white shutters on the windows and the door was the same blend of white and brown. There was room for improvement, but then, it also seemed perfect in its own way.
“The Lovingale,” I said.
Artie nodded his head at me and stayed with the horses.
My siblings were stopped in the path and I reached the door before them. They had heavy luggage in their hands. I noticed each little bird house and detail and realized this house was like one from a story Mother used to tell us.
“It’s beautiful.”
“Beautiful?” Henry snorted. “Just open the door; my suitcase is heavy.”
“It’s beautiful because it reminds me of Mother.”
“Mother doesn’t live in America, half-wit.”
I turned back and looked at Artie who sat still in the wagon. He waved. I waved back, partially trying to stall time and irritate my big brother, which I know was so dreadful and immature of me. I beg pardon for my rude ways, but I hope you won’t give up on me yet.
“Open the door!” Henry fired.
I twisted the knob and they pushed their way in, dragging me along furiously with them.
“You’d think you were under a trance,” Henry spat.
“I was,” I confessed.
“Well, learn to control yourself!” Henry took his belongings and went up the stairs in search of a room.
Felix clasped his hands behind his back and whistled thoughtfully. “Small…but comfortable. It’ll have to do. At least until Father arrives with what we have left of our things. The things he didn’t sell.”
“There’s a good amount of furnishings here,” I offered. “And Father will bring the necessities.”
“Everything we had was necessities!” Felix exclaimed.
“Well, we’re not rich anymore!” I cried. And suddenly, I felt a shiver rise within me. The fear of being without Father and Mother in such a land almost consumed me and I sat down on the vacant floor that felt colder now, and hugged my arms around my knees tightly, imagining Mother’s arms around me. I was hungry and tired from all our traveling. “Father lost the money,” I said.
“Just like Henry loses his temper every time you open your mouth, Annabelle. You should really stop meddling all the time if you want people to like you—”
Felix’s words created a rush of fresh rage that ran through my veins and I stood up and struck him cold against his face. My hand stopped still in the air and I shrunk back inside of myself. What have I just done? Why did I do that?
Claudia stared at me with wide eyes as if I were a monster.
Felix stumbled to the floor. He brought his hand to his cheek and touched it. His face turned red with vexation. “You’re not Father!” he screamed at me and rushed out the door.
How many times have I heard that since coming here?
I felt a presence behind me and I slowly turned around, my eyes drawn to the boy, Artie.
“Did you see that?” I asked, lightly.
“See what?” he grinned like it was funny. Maybe to him, it was. He stepped closer and pulled a stone from his pocket. “You dropped this, I think.”
I took Henry’s stone, and, after looking at it in my palm, firmly held it in my fist, under protecting fingers.
“This means the world to my brother.”
“This little stone?”
I smiled, finally a real smile I had been waiting for. “It’s a big world, you know. But the small things are the things that really matter, aren’t they?”
And I think he understood that.
That night all of us sat indian-style on the floor, huddled close around a lantern, blankets over our shoulders. Henry lit the lantern and tossed away the match. Everything behind us was dark but before us we shared the faint glow.
We sat in silence. That is, until Henry delegated us our instructions for the coming day.
“Tomorrow I shall go into town and get a feel for things,” he advised.
“I want to go with you,” Claudia whined.
“Me too,” Felix said with a glare like icy rain towards me.
“Very well,” Henry looked strangely amongst the others and then to me. He sensed we had tension.
“Annabelle Ingrid, you’re on your own. So don’t get into trouble catching rabbits and singing to birds, alright? I don’t think the people around here like that sort of stuff.”
“Trouble? Me?” I chuckled dryly. “I won’t, Henry Austen, since we’re using our full names here.”
Felix stared at the lantern. It shown in his blue eyes, the same eyes as Henry, Claudia, and Father. “I think the people around here eat the rabbits and birds.”
“There’s a very good chance, since that is common food amongst…” Henry swallowed. “People.”
I shook my head with a sigh. “I want to explore tomorrow. See if there’s other meadows like the one we saw today.”
“Go explore then,” Henry said with a lazy wave of his hand. “I’m not stopping you. Just don’t get into trouble with all the weird things that you do. You trust too easily.”
“Not all the time. But sometimes, I have a feeling about people.”
“Like Arther?” Claudia offered her dreamy input and I frowned at her.
“He said to call him Artie,” I corrected her.
“My mistake,” Claudia replied.
I rolled my eyes a little and my thoughts shifted back home to Father. I had to believe he would come back. But sometimes, you could just see that there was something changed about a person.
My father was once a sailor back in his day. And when I looked into his eyes that last time as he said goodbye to me, I saw a ship. There in his ocean-blue eyes was a ship sailing into the horizon. There was a sailor on that ship. And he had a strange glint in his eyes. He was leaving. Leaving his home, leaving the ones dear in his heart.
Leaving.
And he was never coming back.
That’s what I saw in my father that day.
Felix might have really read my mind that moment, for he bit his lip and said, “I wonder what he’s doing right now.”
“Making preparations to join us. He said it may be sometime in the end of summer, near fall,” Henry said.
“We have the whole summer to ourselves,” Felix brightened up.
“I miss Father.”
“Stop complaining, Claudia,” Henry scowled at her.
“We all do,” I tried to comfort her and wrapped my arms around her shoulders warmly. “Even the ones who don’t have a heart.”
Henry ignored me.
“But whatever happens, we have to be brave. And we will, won’t we?” I gave Claudia a playful nudge. “I know we will.”
“Brave?” Henry scoffed at the word.
“Mother would’ve wanted it. She always told us to be brave.”
“We wouldn’t be here if Mother had her way. And none of this would’ve happened if she was alive!”
“Well, she’s not!” I leapt to my feet. “She’s not, Henry!” I was finally angry at Henry. Right now, all my tender feelings were gone and I was angry at Henry for never being there to help me. “Don’t you see?” my eyes pierced his. “We’re losing Father, too. We have to stay together. We have to be there for each other. I can’t always have you running off alone.” I wanted to give in and cry, then. If he could only have seen the pain I bore all alone.
Henry rolled on his side and went to sleep.
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